No, but really.

Well I didn't promise I'd write every day in my blog, now did I? I actually did do some writing over here though. It's about my New Year's resolutions, which you already know about because they're posted below.

I actually do have things to say on the blog, too. I think about them everyday while I'm at work doing actual work-related things. I would also post at night, but lately, I've been under the weather. So instead, I act like a lifeless blob covered in a snuggie. For real though, I love my snuggie.

So until I feel better or have something to report, this will have to keep you occupied.

PS: I'm looking for health/diet/fitness blogs to read for work-related purposes. Any suggestions?

Adios, 2009.

Ok, look, so everyone else is bringing back their blogs for 2010 (I know; I’m such a sheep sometimes) and I think four months away from this blog was enough to adjust to my new life, so I’m back. I keep reading my Google reader and come across so many things I want to tell you guys about anyways.

It’s time to quit dilly-dallying and get down to business. I’m even getting started on my New Year’s resolution the day before Jan. 1st. That’s how dedicated I am. (And it also means I more than likely won’t be posting on tomorrow, haha.)

First, updates:

Although 2009 was a rough year for lots of people, overall I think it was a good year for me. Although it was probably one of the hardest years of my life, I think I learned a lot and I definitely came out on top. Here's proof:

1) I live in New York City.

2) I got a job as an editorial assistant at a national women’s magazine. (Check for 2009 New Year’s Resolution #1)

3) I lost at least five pounds. (Check for 2009 New Year’s Resolution #2)

4) I still have a thing for long distance boys, but I’m trying out the local scene, too. The boy mentioned in the date below didn’t work out due to moving to New York though.

Second, 2010 Resolutions:

1) Lose another five pounds. (Small goals, but hey, at least I keep them.)

2) Write, write, write. As an EA, I don’t get to write a whole lot yet, so I need/want to keep writing. I’m keeping this resolution pretty open, though. Writing will include this blog and any other possible blogs I may start as well as freelance stuff (which I really do plan on jumping on at some point in 2010).

3) I want to save money. By December 31, 2010, I want to have at least three months rent saved up. This will be no easy feat, but I started this when I started getting real paychecks. I have a lot of big expenses coming up (two weddings!), so I need to get serious about it.

4) Volunteer. Not just anywhere though. I want to find something I’m passionate about, so I imagine that will take me in the direction of something to do with media, women or the military.

I think four resolutions is enough, right? I only made two in 2009, but I kept both of them, which makes me happy.

What about you? Did you make any resolutions?

Wow, it already feels good to be back.

I swear I'm not ignoring you.

Dearest blog,

I'm really sorry for the neglect lately. I've somehow been staying busy between my new writing ventures, the job search (which is getting better), going to the gym (yes! I'm still going strong!) and (gasp!) a social life.

Let's recap my life:

- You can check out my new articles on ChickSpeak about Tammy Tibbetts and the MacDella Cooper Foundation here, Project Girl here, "The Zookeeper's Wife" here and getting your car ready for a roadtrip here. If you're on Twitter, FOLLOW US at @ChickSpeak. We aren't a robot, and I know because I'm the official tweeter! If you're on Tumblr, FOLLOW US here. We'll follow back, too!

- I'm also writing at BizMe.biz. My first article is about the corporate dresscode. I have more coming though, so stay tuned.

- I have a part-time retail job now. (Hey, at least it's something. Although I've had to dress up and wear more makeup for this job than pretty much every other job/internship I've ever had.)

- I have friends and a social life. Sweeeet. I even went on an actual date recently with a guy who actually lives near me. (No more of those out-of-town boys. Although they were fun, haha.)

- I have serious job prospects on the line. I'm not big on talking about it because I do feel it might jinx me, so just keep your fingers crossed.

- My war with the treadmill is definitely going in my favor. In fact, I actually managed to KEEP my weight-related New Year's Resolution this year! I'm thinking of possibly running a 5k sometime this fall. Although my only worry is that I haven't really run outside (and by haven't really I mean haven't at all). Oh well, I suppose I'll try soon!

Ok, that's my recap. I have also been reading a lot about interesting topics in my blogs. Tomorrow I have a 5-hr bus ride back home, so I'm sure I'll end up not doing anything I'm supposed to be doing and blog. For some reason, that's what tends to happen.

Toodles for today,

Cassandra

Yo Quiero Taco Bell Por Favor

If you know me, you know I'm a huge fan of Taco Bell. Yes, I realize it's absolutely horrible, but I just love those Cheesy Fiesta Potatoes and Supreme Chalupas. Plus, I only have it once in a while, so I figure it's ok. (Moderation is key!)

Anyways, today Taco Bell is in my thoughts and prayers. Gidget, the 15-year-old chihuahua, suffered from a stroke Tuesday night and died. You might know her best from her "Yo Quiero Taco Bell" (and yes, Gidget is a she that took on 'he' roles in the campaign) or from her role as Bruiser's mom in Legally Blonde 2. The mostly retired actress enjoyed laying out in the sun, hiking, entertaining people and sleeping for 23 hours per day, said Gidget's trainer Sue Chipperton to People Pets.

Remember the Taco Bell plush dogs? (Pictured below.) At one point, I had all of them. I kind of wish I still did, but I'm pretty sure I sent them to the Salvation Army with the many bags of clothing I sent there. (I'm pretty sure my (old) local Salvation Army could stay open with my donations alone, haha.)

RIP Gidget. My thoughts and prayers go out to Taco Bell, your trainer and anyone else who associated with you.

Are You a Supergirl?

I had the pleasure of interviewing Supergirls Speak Out author Liz Funk for ChickSpeak.com. She's such an awesome girl. Very inspiring, too. You really ought to read the Q&A, then read her book. (Then join ChickSpeak and comment on all of my articles! haha)

Buy Me Some?

Article number two is up now. If you're a female, you should join the site and hang out and chat on the forum. You can also follow the site on Twitter. And there's a group or fan page on Facebook. You can find it on my profile. Read and enjoy! Thanks.

Books, Books, Books

There’s this pretty cool project going on called “Fill in the Gaps: 100 Project.” I discovered it here on the blog, Editorial Ass.

The basic idea is to create a list of 100 books that you have been meaning to read or that you think you should read. Then you start reading them. You have five years to finish the list.

Interested? Check out this blog dedicated to the project: “Fill in the Gaps: 100 Project.”

I want to participate, but coming up with a list of 100 books to read is not very easy. I read over a few of the other lists and here are a few books I think I’ll add to my list:

Farenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury
The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath
Mansfield Park by Jane Austen
The Zookeeper's Wife by Diane Ackerman
Angela’s Ashes by Frank McCourt
Anna Karenina, Leo Tolstoy
Vanity Fair by William Makepeace Thackeray
The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas
Middlemarch by George Eliot

But there are also books I want to read again because I read them when I was younger and don’t feel like I took everything I could from them. Like these:

Things Fall Apart by Chinua Achebe
Their Eyes Were Watching God by Zora Neale Hurston
Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë
Lord of the Flies by William Golding

Ahh, so many books. I’m currently reading The Blind Assassin by Margaret Atwood (one of my favorite authors). So at least I don’t have to include that on my list.

Do you have suggestions for my list? What criteria should I base it on? Do you have a list? What are you reading? Let me know; I’m curious.

Shameless Self Promotion

So I'm writing for a Web site, ChickSpeak.com. It's a pretty cool site, and I definitely believe in the mission. Here's my first article. Check it out!

I am a Blogaholic.

Some of you may have caught my earlier post about possibly being a blogaholic. Well there is no possbility. I -am- a blogaholic. And thanks to Google Reader, my addiction gets worse and worse and worse. I'm currently at 83 subscriptions.

Ok, to make sure you don't think that I'm sitting at a computer all day, I don't necessarily read every post. I skim through a lot of it and read what interests me the most. It's so easy to do on Google Reader, too. I don't have to visit 83 different Web sites when I want to see what's happening.

Last time I got some great suggestions for new blogs. So once again, I figured I'd share a few favorites of mine and ask you about yours. What are you reading? Because here's a spotlight of what I'm reading:

Funemployed in NYC - They have a great "Job of the Day" feature where they find ridiculous job postings. It's pretty funny. They make unemployment funny, which is nice.

Save Like Me - This is SELF's money saving blog. MP Dunleavey gives you great suggestions on how to go about saving money. I like how she uses real life examples, too.

Salon.com's Broadsheet - This is my go-to blog for women's issues and current affairs. I like how they talk about serious and not-so-serious issues with a conversational, witty and amusing tone.

Almost Savvy - This blog isn't updated too frequently, but when it is, you can find some great information.

Beyond the Beauty Pages - This is SELF's beauty blog. I've learned a lot from all the women there. I love reading what they're up to and what they suggest. (I also love that my friend Ale is a regular blogger. She's awesome!)

Meeeeoww.

So if you haven't noticed by now, I'm a cat person. I can't wait until I have my own place and my own cat. Don't get me wrong though; I have two beautiful cats at my parent's home. One technically belongs to my brother and one is mine, but whatever. I could never just take mine (Malificent) away from her sister (Mercedes). I could never take both of them away for the dogs or my parents. So I must get my own cat. If it's a boy, I think I'll name it Maximus. I haven't figured out a girl's name yet.

Anyways, I'm reading this blog Lifehacker and they must be cat lovers over there because they have the cutest ideas. One of my favorites is the Cat Haven made from Ikea shelves. You need a little space, but the cat in the picture looks so happy. Another one of my favorites is the cat perch made from a wine crate. It's a great place for your cat, and it's rather stylish. I will definitely keep these ideas in mind for my future cats. Cute, huh?

Well this is even cuter. Check it out:



...love cats. Can't wait to adopt one.

Another Magazine Death Close To Home

Reading Gawker's Great Magazine Die-Off and Web sites like The Magazine Death Pool always make me sad. I hate watching the industry continue to fall apart.

Some magazine foldings hurt a little more than others. The first magazine fold that really affected me was JANE magazine. It had always been one of my favorites, and I happened to be interning there when it folded. So I experienced my first magazine folding at my first national magazine internship. It was really tough to pack up the office and watch my editors become unemployed.


It was even sadder watching it again while watching Fashionista Diaries. (I'm on three episodes, by the way. Although you'd never know because it's just my arm or the back of my head or my face is blurred out.) Although I'm glad I kept in touch with my editors, and they've all landed on their feet in great if not better positions.

Today another magazine I interned at folded: Conde Nast Portfolio.
Of course I'm not interning there now. In fact, I interned there directly after JANE magazine. I technically interned for the Web site because the magazine had not really begun its monthly publication. I never really imagined myself at such a magazine, but I really enjoyed my time there and met great editors. (Luckily, most of them had already moved on from the magazine before today.)

Nevertheless it still saddens me to see it fold. I also feel bad because it was one of the biggest magazine launches in recent years. (It launched in 2007.) There's definitely a lot of talk going on about it. You can read about it here (on their site) and here (from a former employee) and here.

I hope I don't see any of the other magazines I've interned at face the same fate. Something tells me they won't, but either way, I'm starting to get a little scared. Anyone else seen any magazine folds that hurt a little more than others? I hope not!

Miss North Carolina Wins!

So did anyone watch Miss USA Sunday night? Because I did. First, I'm so happy Miss North Carolina won simply because I'm from North Carolina. Second, I'm really annoyed with the media attention. To recap: Perez Hilton was a judge, and he posed a question to Miss California about gay marriage (surprise!). This was her answer:


I LOVED IT! Her answer was honest and true even in the face of Perez Hilton. Way to go, Miss California! Now I'm not saying I agree with her because I don't. I am glad she stuck to her beliefs. Ok, she didn't have the strongest answer. "Opposite marriages" still makes me giggle, but seriously, you get the point.

Perez, of course, didn't like the answer so much. Here's his response:


What makes me mad is that Miss California didn't even have the WORST answer to a question. At least she answered the question!! Did anyone see Miss Arizona's answer to the question about health care? What was her answer? Loosely worded: "Whatever we do, we should do it with integrity." ....really?

So I just watched Perez on MSNBC:


And here are my questions: Shouldn't both the President of the United States and Miss America both represent the entire nation? And since when can one person please everyone?

Media-Go-Round Spinoff

Wow, I've really dropped the ball on posting, huh? Well, you can take it two ways: you can be angry at me for not posting because I've been busy or you can be happy because I'm starting to have a life again. Anyways, on top of not posting, I've also forgotten to do a Media-Go-Round post for the past two weeks. But I hope you've kept up with it on your own. Anyways, I thought I just share a few things I found interesting.

- I got my first Mine magazine. First, they didn't even get my magazine choices correct. Lame, right? Although they did apologize and extend my subscription with another issue. I also now have the secrets to Tiger Woods' swing, which I wouldn't have if the switch up didn't happen. Second, I'm going to have to say I wasn't impressed. It was a really flimsy magazine with maybe one or two articles from each magazine. (Faithful readers, remember the post about dressing for your size, and I said it was probably from Glamour? I was wrong. It was from In Style, and I just re-read the article in Mine.) On the up side, it makes for good gym reading material, and I was one of the 31,000 to get a print copy. Want to read more about it? Click here.

- There's been a lot of magazines crossing the line when it comes to ads and articles. Some magazines are getting called out by ASME. (That's the American Society of Magazine Editors, if you didn't know.) This is how ASME explains itself and it's decisions. I kind of feel like it shouldn't matter what's on the cover of a magazine. In all honest, most magazines are pretty much one giant advertisement for thousands of products. It's sad, but true. And if it helps them sell at this point, good. Let them get back on their feet.

- So French Elle decided to put stars who aren't wearing any makeup on the cover of their April issue. Or so they claim. Yes, the women look a little tired, but I don't really notice any blemishes or anything. I don't think they're makeupless at all. That's just my opinion though. I like this guy's opinion, too. You ought to check it out.

- I've already posted about the whole 55-year-old intern thing, but it still makes me want to throw up a little. They actually set up an Executive Internship Program. I think I just died inside a little.

- Jossip folded today. Wait, I mean "it's on hiatus."

- My thoughts and prayers go out to Roxana Saberi and her family.

Are You Stressed Out?

Did you know today is National Stress Awareness Day? Do you think they picked the day after taxes are due on purpose? Because I imagine that most people are acutely aware of their stress levels right now. I also imagine some people may be much more stressed than usual.

So I thought I’d share a few things to alleviate some of the stress you may or may not be feeling.

- Back up your LinkedIn contacts! Just in case something goes wrong (knock on wood), keep track of all the hard work you put into your LinkedIn connections by following the steps on Almost Savvy’s post. You’ll save contact information for all your connections, your profile and your recommendations. Then I suggest putting those files on one of those little storage thingies. You know what I’m talking about, right? BAM. Less stress!

- Laugh a little! I already shared one of my favorite sites, Fmylife.com, but there are so many other great ones. I literally laugh out loud a lot of the time. Two other sites that make me giggle are Said In Bed and One Sentence. Maybe it isn’t nice to laugh at others, but if they’re brave enough to post it online, chances are they’re laughing, too.

- Go bowling! Before you say it’s too expensive, here’s a coupon to AMF bowling centers. With it, you can play up to 10 games for 99 cents each. The coupon is good until April 30, so take your family or friends and relieve some of that pent up stress!

- Let go! My mom always tells me to take things one day at a time. You’d think this was easy, but it’s actually not. Use this link to learn how what to let go of and how to do it. It can’t hurt to try.

I Thunk I Can, I Thunk I Can

So my friend Cookie has recently started posting these “Thursday Thunks” posts. They seemed like fun, so I thought I’d jump on the bandwagon. Clearly these posts (when I remember it’s Thursday) will be a bit more on the personal side. I hope you enjoy it though, and if you start them too, let me know!

1. Recently Berleen and I discovered the allure of the Twilight series. Have you ever been sucked in to the latest "thing"? (Like Harry Potter, the movie Titanic, social networking, etc. etc. etc.)

Totally, I’ve already read the entire Twilight series. I’m kind of over that now. I’ve been doing the Facebook thing for a while, but I definitely hopped on the Twitter train. I actually like it, too. I never did the whole Harry Potter thing. I couldn’t get past the first page of the first book. I was 12-ish when Titanic came out, so Leo DiCaprio was (and still is) dreamy.

I think it’s safe to say I get sucked into the latest “thing” quite frequently.

2. What software do you use for your email?

I use Gmail. Is that considered software?

3. Are you comfortable being nude?

Quite honestly, no.

4. What is something you plan on doing this summer?

Go to Las Vegas with the girls! I’ve never been, so I’m super excited.

5. Do you have a favorite movie/book quote? If so, what is it?

A favorite? I can’t really pick one, so I’ll just share the one in my head.

“No, I don't think I will kiss you, although you need kissing, badly. That's what's wrong with you. You should be kissed and often, and by someone who knows how.”

Do you know who said it and what movie it was said in???

6. How many email addresses do you have?

Two. Although I rarely check my school address anymore.

7. Is the sky falling?

It sure seemed like it yesterday, but I hope not.

8. Have you been to the Grand Canyon?

No, but maybe when I go to Vegas, I’ll see the Grand Canyon, too. That’d be pretty neat.

9. When was the last time you mailed a hand written letter?

Last Thursday. I’ve had to write a lot of Thank You notes lately. That counts, right?

Karma Wednesday

Nothing like a little break for a holiday. I hope everyone had a nice Easter/Passover/weekend, etc. I thought I'd just leave you with a few tidbits today.

1) My friend Michael Northrop officially has his first YA book out: Gentlemen. You should definitely pick it up and read it. The cover itself makes me want to pick it up and read it, which I will when I head to a bookstore. Check out the story behind it. I am excited to get my book autographed, too. Also, once upon a time, our luck/successes seemed to be closely linked, so hopefully, his luck will soon kickstart mine. He even has another book coming out in 2009: Trapped. Congrats!

2) My mile is getting better! I can run longer, too. How exciting. Although, I have some beef with health magazines (SELF included) and Web sites. I've recently decided I would try "interval sprinting" because I hear it helps trim tummy fat more than just running regularly. So I looked into some "rountines" to try out like this one. YEESH! Can you make a beginner running rountine please? I'm excited if I run 15-2o mins with maybe one minute of running a little faster than ususal. I tried to add a few interval sprints today and ended up with my left foot cramping up. Oh well. I guess I'll try again tomorrow.

3) It's TAX DAY. Hope you turned in your taxes, get a sweet refund and scored some great deals today. I actually turned in my taxes a while ago and got my tax refund. It sort of funded my visit to NY back in March.

Ok, I think I'm going to spend some time reading before bed. I'm currently reading Women & Fiction: Short stories by and about women. It was published in 1975. So far, it's not bad, but I really did not enjoy Gertrude Stein's Miss Furr and Miss Skeene. Good night for now.

Ca-Ching!

Self recently launched a new blog, Save Like Me, and I love it. It’s so personal and so informative, which I think make for a generally fabulous blog.

One blog post that really got my attention was “My Favorite Ez Money Saver.” I was like, “Oh! A money saver tip! I love saving money!” I really do, too. I absolutely hate spending my own money. I squirrel it away in bank accounts or piggy banks or little bags tucked away in my underwear drawer. But then I read it. She suggests saving every five dollar bill you get.

Sounds pretty genius, if you have a continual flow of cash in and out of your wallet. Do I? Not so much. I often rely on check and credit cards to get me through the day, with an emergency cash stash just in case someone doesn’t take cards.

I’m just starting off in this whole “real world” adventure, so to me, five bucks is still a lot of money. Seriously. I’m not kidding. I imagine a lot of you are just starting off, too. So this is my take on the Ez Money Saver:

Idea 1: Save one dollar bill every time you get change from something! So if you buy a magazine that costs about three dollars with a five dollar bill that you don’t feel fully comfortable saving yet, you save AT LEAST one of those dollars you get back!

Idea 2: Save your change! I recently went out to eat with my aunt, and this guy passed by me dropping all his change. Being the nice person I am, I bend down to help him recover his loss. He says, “Don’t worry about it!” and runs out of the place. I continue to collect his change and proceed to put it in my pocket. I just made 73 cents. Then I went home and added the change to my super cool “piggy bank” that counts my money as I put it in. I love watching the number get bigger and bigger. Love it! But the point is, don’t be like that crazy guy and forget your change. Every penny adds up. So empty out your wallet or pick up that penny on the street (I pick up all the pennies I see. Sorry, but an extra penny is always good luck whether heads up or down.), and throw it in a super cool piggy bank like me or use a coffee can or use a sock. Just save it.

Idea 3: This idea is more for a card carrying person. If the purchase is under five dollars, don’t use your card. If you don’t have the cash, don’t get it. If you do have the cash, please go back to idea 1. Presto! You’ve saved!

The Beauty of a Good Deal

With spring finally arriving and summer on its way, it’s time to shove those sweatpants and heavy jackets back into the depths of your closet and bust out the tank tops! And since you’ll probably be going out more, you’ll probably start to beautify yourself a little more. Well guess what! It’s a good time for that because there are so many great beauty sales happening right now!

My good friend Ale, over at SELF’s Beyond The Beauty Pages blog, has found some amazing deals just for you. (She, along with the other great gals in the beauty department, is also keeping track of spring trends, in case you’re clueless on what to buy!)

And if that’s not enough, check out this coupon for a free Signature Collection Body Care item with a $10 purchase at Bath & Body Works (good until April 12) and this coupon for a free mini body lotion with no extra purchase at Victoria’s Secret (good until April 12). You can also get a free Naturally Tote with a $25 purchase using the same VS coupon until April 6.

And if that’s not enough, get yourself ready for Spa Week, where lots of spa around the country are offering fabulous treatments for a mere $50 starting April 13. Some of these treatments are actually worth up to $300 and maybe more. Book your appointments now though!

Am I an Apple or a Pear?

Isaiah sent me a post from Jezebel (Great blog; strongly suggest you read it.) titled “In Which We Explore The Ridiculousness Of "Dressing For Your Shape.” He suggested I post about it instead of him. Personally, I’m interested in his point of view, but nonetheless, here’s my side.

The post generally explains that the names for the body sizes that many magazines use to help us readers shop for clothes are fairly ridiculous, dated and offensive. You know the body sizes I’m talking about: pear-shaped, tall, boyish, etc.

This quote pretty much sums it up: “Which is all well and good, I suppose, unless you happen to be a Pear-Shaped Busty Tall Woman looking for ideas on Plus-Size gowns, because the advice for each category is markedly different, which would lead many women to believe that there are only certain aspects of their bodies that are truly worth addressing, as opposed to concentrating on what fits and feels good.”

I have to say I completely agree. I have absolutely no idea what “size” my body is. (Although, at 5 foot 3 and a half inches, I can pretty much forget the “tall” part.) Even my beloved SELF magazine (I really do love this magazine) trips me up with their body sizes: top-heavy, thick-waisted, petite and bottom-heavy. To be honest, a lot of the time I just flip past those pages because I get annoyed trying to figure out what I am. And sometimes, I like a look that isn't for my body type (I think), which makes me a little sad inside. Should I not wear that? WHY NOT?

And I really hate it when they have articles about picking out jeans. First off, standing in front of a mirror trying to judge what my behind is shaped like and so forth is never enjoyable. (Although I do remember an article in Glamour, I think, that had a story about buying jeans from Web sites that designed—almost molded—jeans to your exact measurements, which I enjoyed.)

I also hate some of the beauty articles for that matter, too. I cannot, for the life of me, tell what shape my face is, which leads me to become a nervous wreck because what if I pick the wrong haircut and look… well, ugly.

First, I’m sad because I can’t wear the clothes I think are cute. Second, I’m sad because my behind and a mirror are not the best of friends. Third, I’m sad because the haircut I want won’t look right. Anyone else noticing the trend?

Instead of helping you feel better about “shopping for your type,” magazines really are kind of making things worse. Pointing out trends or even how to mix simple articles of clothing is cool for the most part. And I know there is a good intention behind helping us shop for our type, but it just has the opposite affect for me. So I’ll stick to the traditional shopping route. If I like it, I’ll try it on. If it looks good, then it was made for my body type. End of story.

Wake-Up Call

SELF magazine had a really interesting article in the March 2009 issue, “Single, pregnant and panicked.” When I read it, it shocked me and made me think. Then Salon.com wrote a blog post about the article, and it made me want to talk about it here.

The general point of the story in SELF is this: Unexpected teen pregnancies are not the bulk of unexpected pregnancies. That said, guess who makes up the bulk. Females in their 20s do. Women like me. Wow.

The beginning of the post on Salon.com starts with this: “About half of American women will have an accidental pregnancy before the age of 45.” I’m sure that not all of those women are single, nor are all of those pregnancies are unwanted. In fact, to be honest, I was unexpected. My parents were planning on waiting another year or so, but clearly I was a little impatient to get my life started.

But why the (for the most part) college-educated woman in her 20s? Some ideas include getting married later in life, but still being sexually active; living with their partners; and even being forced into having unprotected sex. SELF continues to say that birth rates may have increased because more unmarried women are deciding to keep their babies. I think maybe it’s partly a lack of education about the proper use of birth control or just not properly using birth control or this ridiculous notion some of us have that “it will never happen to me.”

But I think this quote says a lot: "It's confusing to talk about it," says Shanti Kulkarni, Ph.D., assistant professor in the department of social work at the University of North Carolina at Charlotte. "It's easier to coalesce around this idea that it's not good for teenagers to get pregnant. It's not as clear what pregnancy means for the life of a woman in her 20s." For some women, surprise motherhood ends up being the blessing of a lifetime. Others choose abortion with no regrets. But the high rate of unintended pregnancy remains distressing, Kulkarni says, because "it suggests that women are not as in control of their sexuality and childbearing as we would hope."

Scary, isn’t it though? How do you go about solving it? Or should it be labeled as a problem? You can’t really tell a 20-something-year-old woman that sex is bad. You can tell her unprotected sex is bad, but chances are she knows that. What approach do you take? I’m glad SELF decided to run this story though because at least it brings about awareness.

The part Salon.com picks up is that in all the examples of SELF the women either give the child up for adoption or keep their child, but end up needing support from family. The article lacks two major points of view: the women who had an abortion and the woman who kept her baby and continued to support herself and child. I kind of agree. Thanks SELF for bringing this out into the public, but we need to flesh out the whole story. What happens to those women? What was their decision making process like? Do they come out ok, too?

By sharing all sides of the story, doesn’t that make you a little more educated at least in your choices should you ever become pregnant? And beyond the women, what about the men? I know SELF is a woman’s magazine, but shouldn’t someone inform men that, guess what, this girl in the story could be your girlfriend, and you’re about to have a baby.

I’ve never been in this situation, and I pray I never am. I’ve known a lot of women in this position though. So not to be a Debbie Downer, but remember, a lot of you are 20-something-year-old women, a lot of you are dating 20-something-year-old women, a lot of you have 20-something-year-old daughters, a lot of you have sons who are dating 20-something-year-old women.

Please read both stories. Let it sink in. If you want to chat about it, leave a comment or e-mail me.

PS: If you plan to comment about it, I’d prefer no negativity. I realize everyone’s opinions are different, but being that this is my blog, I ask you to be respectful. Otherwise, I’ll delete the comment. The point of this post is to bring awareness; not to judge.